Just Admit It.

something new

Tue, 14 Mar 2006 21:38:15 GMT

I made a new lj. Click: take_offs

Burt, I love you with all my heart.

Sun, 12 Mar 2006 17:29:00 GMT

I have a thumb war casualty.
I also have a new goal: I am going to meet Mr. Burt's Bees and profess my love to him. YESSSSS.
I'm thinking about getting a new lj. For the same reason I switched from blackink to keepfaith-- I just kind of want to start over. I don't like deleting stuff because I like to go back and see how I've changed (holy Jesus I've changed!), but sometimes looking at those old entries reminds me how stupid and naive I was. Here's a cliche for you to laugh at: I've ended a chapter of my life and I'm moving on. Yeah, moving on by getting a new lj. Hahahahaha. I'm aware of my loser-ness.
I felt really cool though, because I woke up this morning and read the paper while eating breakfast. Guess what all you World Geographers? Slobadon Milosevic died in his jail cell last night. Maybe that class isn't as stupid as I thought.

Me and You and Everyone We Know.

Fri, 10 Mar 2006 04:40:25 GMT

So if you were to go back 2 years, I would be drugged up on pills with names a mile long right now. I had on a cast that poked a partly numb spot on my back, and I had a tube pulling all the excess blood from my shoulder. It's likely a lady was scaring me half to death with her cold hands as she checked my blood pressure too.
And sure, I am completely and totally aware that the few of you who actually read this are likely to not give a crap or think I'm bragging, but I don't care. After all, you're reading this, aren't you? Besides, it's really not all that great to have an excrutiating pain in your back where nerves are only beginning to work again. I wouldn't exactly want anyone to try it.

"As soon as I'd done it though, I realized, it's alcohol that just lets the fire keep going, but it's gasoline that burns up."

almost there.

Sat, 04 Mar 2006 21:16:28 GMT

You and me and everyone we know:
we've got nothing to do,
and nowhere to go.

I found this and thought it was cool:

What does your handwriting say about YOU?

The results of your analysis say:

You plan ahead, and are interested in beauty, design, outward appearance, and symmetry.
You are a shy, idealistic person who does not find it easy to have relationships, especially intimate ones.
You are diplomatic, objective, and live in the present.
You are a talkative person, maybe even a busybody!
You enjoy life in your own way and do not depend on the opinions of others.

bee + a + Madi + tea + full. heh.

Wed, 01 Mar 2006 22:39:44 GMT

I said that I would come home and get to working on my homework right away, but that's too easy.
Despite the common dislike for Martha Stewart, I still love her. Come on, I can't help but love any woman who's going to make a cake entirely out of chocolate crepes and then sit it next to a gorgeous cheesecake.
My computer is making little glitches of sound and I can't figure out why or how.
And Seal's voice is to die for.
So this is a perfectly random update to match a perfectly beautiful day.

Katherine what's her face.

Mon, 27 Feb 2006 22:45:33 GMT

So I'm trying to knit a scarf with cables and purls by the end of this week. Yeah, pretty much insane, but I want to have it when I go to Colorado for skiing/snowboarding (still thinking on it). After all, you need something to keep you warm when there's snow.
Not much time to be updating. I've got homework in every class. Funny thing about getting lots of homework is that I always work really hard to get it done and then realize that what it really was, was that I just never manage my time well and mess around before actually starting on it.
School is alright. A Tale Of Two Cities isn't nearly as bad as I expected. I'm actually decently enjoying it. I'm pretty much a permanent fixture next to my teacher's desk because I have so many questions. I'm making better grades than most of the kids in my class though, so that works.
I'm glad Madame is gone. I really did not like Mr. Q at first, but when I finally realized that he was an awesome teacher compared to easy and crappy Madame I actually started to like him. Of course, I made a 72 on the quiz today. It's better than half of the grades I saw though. Poor guy, he has to put up with Kristen Davis and Katherine what's her face who have the most annoying voices EVER.
Homework time.

i spell favourite different

Sat, 18 Feb 2006 04:34:08 GMT

So maybe things aren't going to be so bad.
Yeah, my parents keep fighting about me, and yeah, this was the worst fight so far, but they made up.
Sure, I wish it didn't have to be this way: where I'm constantly having to be something I'm not, but what won't kill me will make me stronger.
I'm thinking rock-climbing would be fun. I can see the eyes rolling, and I can hear you all saying, "Hah, Sarah? Don't be a moron," but I really think it'd be fun. I'll save you a moment and summarize that I had a conversation with my friend Jen about it.
I'm trying to figure out the people I'm hanging around with. Sometimes I really have to wonder about them. I mean, half the time I'm around them they're just putting me down. I know they're joking most of the time, but it gets old. It gets old really fast. Really really fast.
But there are those other friends that I have that know just what to say. They make me smile even when I just want to curl up and cry. They're what makes life bearable.

Smiling is my favourite.

it's nice to know nothing i do is enough.

Thu, 16 Feb 2006 03:44:37 GMT

I'm the daughter that has spent her whole life trying to make her dad proud of her, and is he? No, of course not. What kind of insane moron wants a lazy daughter who doesn't play sports? Not my dad. No. No way. He's got himself a disapointment. Yeah, I'm a disappointment to my father. The man I've tried to impress my whole life up until this moment is disappointed in me because I was born into this world with a stubborn mind of my own. God cursed me with free will. Yeah, that's it.
In my 14 years of being his daughter, I've never once heard him brag to his co-workers, friends, or family about how he's got a daughter who wants to be a surgeon, or maybe a forensic illustrator, or maybe even an OB-GYN (the obstetrics part) and that I've gotten 1st places in art contests, and how he's so proud to be my father because I'm not a mind-less idiot. He's never even told me that he's proud of me, or that's he feels lucky to be my dad.
I just wish he'd get it through his head that my not doing sports isn't to make him mad. It's just something I'm not good at. Never have been.
It just sucks to know that despite my effort to be the daughter that's smart and witty doesn't make him proud. Who really cares if my dreams are completely the opposite of anything they're "supposed" to be. Who wants their daughter to be an overweight disappointment? Yeah, that's what I am.

I knew the happiness was too good to be true.

"crap i feel."

Sun, 12 Feb 2006 04:00:09 GMT

Woke up this morning and took a shower.
Felt like crap.
Did chores and ate breakfast.
Still felt like crap.
Forgot about lunch and got on the computer.
Crap I feel.
Took a nap and woke up feeling even more tired.
More crap.
Ate dinner and did the dishes.
Suprisingly enough, felt a little better.
Got on the computer.
Crap crap crap.

But you know what's cool? I re-did my myspace today. :D
Say-ruh like-y.

I've trained my hair to curl to my command.. for the most part.

Thu, 09 Feb 2006 02:55:27 GMT

Apparently I've got the eyelashes of Twiggy and the eyelashes Madonna is paying $400 for to be individually glued to her eyelids. That works for me.
I really want to go swimming. No idea why, but I have this craving for the sun on my back and a pool of warm water. (No, not a bath.)
I'm still getting used to this whole waking up at 5 45 thing to get dressed and ready. So far, I haven't missed the bus. I had my close encounter this morning though. Never thought I would say this, but thank the Lord for Gerhold.

Pixie Dust.

Sat, 04 Feb 2006 07:23:40 GMT

I guess you could say that my habits are a bit weird. After all, it is 1:11 in the morning and I'm updating this journal while doing my homework. I'm nocturnal and I doubt I'll ever change. I just think more late at night. When all is still, except me. Just knowing that my thoughts can be all my own if I don't want to share them makes me happy. It's just... nice.
Nobody has to know just how late I was up. Nobody has to know what I was doing. Ect, etc. I like that. It's like being a little kid again. When I knew something no one else in my class knew. I could just dangle it over their heads.
I can dangle my thoughts over their heads and see if they catch on. See if Tinkerbell's magic pixie dust helps them to stumble over something I was pondering only nights before.

That's my soapbox speech of the night.
Enjoy, if you dare.

Oh Lord.

Fri, 03 Feb 2006 04:22:19 GMT

My dog is a physco teenager-at-heart. The little turd (that I love) decides that he can't find the strength to stand up, so all hell breaks loose in the Holmes household and next thing you know my mom and aunt are whisking him off to an E.R. Well, low-and-behold, they finally get there and my mom picks him up around the front of his body and his legs flip out, then she sets him down on the ground and he just kind of wobbles. She gets the paperwork and starts filling it out, takes a look to see how he's doing, and BY GEORGE HE'S RUNNING IN FREAKING CIRCLES!
He's on medicine of some sort now. They might as well have given him something for his being bipolar. Jesus.

Welp, thought I'd update you on the most exciting thing in my life as of this moment.

I need sleep.
Night. :)

nuts, bolts, and SCREWS

Tue, 31 Jan 2006 02:33:13 GMT

A project has officially been dumped on my shoulders, oh, but don't worry. I'll have it done by tomorrow. Lovely and everything. I won't be happy because I'm not going to even be in the class that period, but the project will. I don't care how late I have to stay up in order to get it done, but I promise I'll get it done. Mmhmm. So less agitated rambling out of me and more butt hauling.

asdklfjaslkd

Well, I got screwed. At least I can admit to that.

for future reference:

Mon, 30 Jan 2006 02:59:53 GMT

I try to be a pretty accepting person. I'll take a lot of crap before I get really frustrated, but there are just those THINGS that drive me up the wall.
1. when people text like mad while at people's houses.
2. when people are late. and they don't call. they don't make ANY effort to try and let you know they're going to be another 30 minutes, or so.
3. when i ruin the moment

That's really it. That's 2 things you can avoid and 1 I can work on.

Sophie's World

Sat, 28 Jan 2006 20:53:47 GMT

Because I thought it was cool. Or something:

1. Grab the nearest book.
2. Open the book to page 123.
3. Find the last sentence.
4. Post the text of the sentence in your journal along with these instructions.
5. Don't search around and look for the coolest book you can find. Do what's actually next to you.

She wrote that we know the moon is not made of green cheese and that there are also craters on the dark side of the moon, that both Socrates and Jesus were sentenced to death, that everybody has to die sooner or later, that the great temples on the Acropolis were built after the Persian wars in the fifth century B.C. and that the most important oracle in ancient Greece was the oracle at Delphi.

is that a pair of eyes i see looking in my direction?

Sat, 28 Jan 2006 00:33:27 GMT

I like how things change. How one minute they're horrible and you're hating everything, and then the next things are just fine.
I don't know, I guess things (or people) are just looking up.
It's nice.
And I laughed all 4th period Thursday. Really, I mean it. A whole hour of non-stop laughter. My abs hurt 15 minutes into it, and then they numbed over. Ask Matthew Shirley. I'm pretty sure he wants to wring my neck for not shutting up.

dear pip. love biddy.

Sat, 21 Jan 2006 05:29:58 GMT

it's pretty sad when i start comparing my love life to great expectations, but it's happened.

friday night and i've watched disney while working on the little homework i have.
the night is young though, and it's now been named a feel-good friday.
Feel-Good Friday- (n.) light a candle. lay in bed and write. listen to the cure. talk on the phone/IM. read a nice book.

my post sounds depressing, but seriously, feel-good fridays are my favorites. they make me feel good. in case it wasn't obvious enough.

going back to the nest. :D

dancing is good for the soul

Fri, 20 Jan 2006 02:54:50 GMT

i don't know why, but i feel like dancing.
i suppose that's good, i mean, it's not like i'm the slow dance kind of kid, so it'll be a happy crazy dance.
i guess i'm strattling myspace and livejournal. maybe juggling? whichever the better visual is. i like myspace, but it doesn't have much to it. livejournal, on the otherhand, is meant to be written in. i think i had more blogs than healthy on myspace, but that's fine.
i like to write.
and those of you reading (the few, huzzah!)(oh dear, i'm mental) should know that by now.

i guess the best lyrics come when you're just sitting and tapping your foot, because lately that's been what's happening. i'm going through the phase again where i'm inspired to do something.
eventually i'll be able to pick up my guitar and strum away. for now i'll find a melody to edit into my background.

one day i'm going to live in the city.

a warm and fuzzy feeling

Wed, 18 Jan 2006 02:33:05 GMT

i'm at that awkward stage in my life right now. not really sure why either. it's strange too because it's that stage where you think people don't like you, but the thing is is that it's more of a half-baked experience because everytime the feeling really starts to sink in the person i thought didn't like to me talks to me.
confused yet?
i've been writing again lately. not just in this thing, but in my private journals. eh, they're not really private though because half the time they're a song that i wrote and ended up posting in my profile well hidden by the more known-of lyrics.
and i'm singing a bit more these days. i guess i'm in a good mood. cold weather does that to me. it gives me time to think things through.
i was about to jump to a bad decision on whether or not to continue in a friendship i've had since 7th-ish/8th grade. i don't know if anyone still reads this, but i don't plan on posting names. or even hinting at what the confusion was caused by. last time i did that i nearly cost another friendship.
my goodness i'm messed up. well, i could've figured that out from my dreams.
myspace has been consuming my computer time lately.
i didn't realize how much i had to say until i just sat down here and started writing. it's nice to know i have a place to write things i've been thinking about.

An update on my life.

Fri, 30 Dec 2005 17:42:27 GMT

I'm so excited. I officially have a car, and even though it's used and I'll eventually have to share it with my sister, the ride is amazing and it still looks like a brand new car (except when you look at the mileage) because my dad is a neat freak when it comes to his cars. Very exciting.
My Christmas was nice. I think things that were bad between a family member and I were smoothed over, so that made my day much better. The gifts involved in the day were well thought and things I'd picked out for myself matched unbelieveably well with the clothing I received. Now I have to clean my room enough to find places for these new things.
Went to Florida and saw Uncle Dan and my grandparents. My uncle had a bit of a tough time (I could tell) because a year ago Aunt Joan (his significant other) was still around. He spent a lot of time with the whole family and told lots of stories about him as a kid. ABSOLUTELY HILARIOUS.

So there's my past few days. A long update for the readers and for the many who just glance over this, here's the Reader's Digest version:

Sarah has a car and her Christmas in both Texas and Florida was great.

"how are you still breathing?"

Sat, 17 Dec 2005 05:21:35 GMT

Sarah-music= ERROR
Sarah+music= :D
Sarah+foot tapping+pen+paper= a song?

woah...
i didn't know i had that ability

i went to a christmas party and got an awesome white elephant gift. that's right... a bar of toblerone and a big bag of ARMY MEN! there seem to be many art projects in my future. mmmmhmmmmmm :D

tolerance is key

Sun, 16 Oct 2005 17:43:07 GMT

read on if you're tolerant:

so i've been thinking about death lately. (not in some depressed way) people say they're afraid of it, but what's really to fear? if you've accepted god in your life (this is where the tolerance part comes in) then you have nothing to be scared of. you've got something amazing waiting for you when you die.
i guess because of this realization i've decided that i don't want a funeral where everyone comes in black; i want a party full of vibrant colors. death isn't really the end, it's just the beginning of something new and great.

if you weren't tolerant enough to read that, start here:

it's understandable if you're not big on the whole christianity bit, so if that's why you weren't reading that part, just think of it as whatever you believe in (if you do).
woah! a bluejay! i love bluejays! they're so purrty :D random, but not really because one is sitting right outside this window.
it's gorgeous outside.
i won a sweatshirt at church today, but i got a shirt instead because they didn't have any smalls.
i get to spend an hour or 2 with a bunch of ncl girls at a tea thing today.
i got to go do charity work yesterday morning (!) and i had lots of fun. choose a natural high, right? there's nothing like the feeling you get after you've done something good... i love it.
i've taken 3 showers in the past 24 hours. crazzzyy.
there was a cat fight friday morning outside my morning... it woke me up at 4:07, and then there was one last night between fair and creek (i think the fair cats won) haha... we have bragging rights for the next year :D that last touchdown was truly amazing/lucky... you have to admit.

!

Fri, 05 Aug 2005 01:42:25 GMT

i'm so ready to see everyone again
despite how incredibly fun this summer has been
i've still missed y'all like crazy

and i'm ready to meet new people
or catch up with the ones i thought "were too cool for me"

WOO...

looking at my feet, i realized...

Sat, 07 May 2005 13:55:13 GMT

there's a time and place for everything
now is not the time
now is not the place

behind bars

Sat, 08 Jan 2005 17:51:12 GMT

sorry guys.... friends only

prying eyes must be stopped

comment to be added